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Post by Dianne on Mar 2, 2009 12:11:23 GMT -5
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Post by pilar on Mar 2, 2009 20:20:18 GMT -5
(I wrote this in my other haven a couple of weeks ago in his astrological thread. I thought I'd share it here....)
Whoever wins G's heart will be very lucky.
However....she's gonna have to put up with a lot of shet, too.
I love him, but he's a very complicated individual. And he'll also be throwing a lot of "tests" her way....
Long story short....to see if she really loves the real deal....not the personna he shows to the public or people who don't know him.
(Then a sweetheart asked me if he would still be the same way if he were not famous....and here is my response)
Oh, yes.
For example....the man has a temper....and he'll let it fly far more often in front of someone he's "let in" rather than stifling it in front of an aquaintance. There are aspects of his chart that are NOT GOING TO CHANGE....for anybody. So....they will have to just accept that...or not.
This is sacrilidgeous to say on the "mommy sites"....but G has NEVER lacked for female company.
He will continue to charm and flirt with women.....even after he's married or in a long term relationship. But it is NOT a two way street here. He's can get extremely jealous....not all the time....but it's there. The woman in his life must constantly reassure him that she is HIS...and no one else's....BUT....without smothering him. Smothering him is the fastest way to lose him.
He needs LOTS of affection....but he also need PLENTY of space.
If he tells his girl that he wants to be alone.....or takes off in his car for a day or so....she'll have to understand that and not take it personally.
It's a fine line....not easy to balance . She'll have to be a strong, independent woman...but also traditional in the important areas....home life, kids, family, etc.
Her life with him will be full....however, he's NOT easy to live with.
I'll stop now, before this becomes a book.
XO _________________
_________________
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Post by Dianne on Mar 2, 2009 20:35:17 GMT -5
(I wrote this in my other haven a couple of weeks ago in his astrological thread. I thought I'd share it here....) Whoever wins G's heart will be very lucky. However....she's gonna have to put up with a lot of shet, too. I love him, but he's a very complicated individual. And he'll also be throwing a lot of "tests" her way.... Long story short....to see if she really loves the real deal....not the personna he shows to the public or people who don't know him. (Then a sweetheart asked me if he would still be the same way if he were not famous....and here is my response) Oh, yes. For example....the man has a temper....and he'll let it fly far more often in front of someone he's "let in" rather than stifling it in front of an aquaintance. There are aspects of his chart that are NOT GOING TO CHANGE....for anybody. So....they will have to just accept that...or not. This is sacrilidgeous to say on the "mommy sites"....but G has NEVER lacked for female company. He will continue to charm and flirt with women.....even after he's married or in a long term relationship. But it is NOT a two way street here. He's can get extremely jealous....not all the time....but it's there. The woman in his life must constantly reassure him that she is HIS...and no one else's....BUT....without smothering him. Smothering him is the fastest way to lose him. He needs LOTS of affection....but he also need PLENTY of space. If he tells his girl that he wants to be alone.....or takes off in his car for a day or so....she'll have to understand that and not take it personally. It's a fine line....not easy to balance . She'll have to be a strong, independent woman...but also traditional in the important areas....home life, kids, family, etc. Her life with him will be full....however, he's NOT easy to live with. I'll stop now, before this becomes a book. XO _________________ _________________ Pilar, I must say your description is excellent and I am a great judge of people and I get the same feeling....I mean exactly... Now where and how did you come up with this? I think the first step to love relationship with Gerry is a gal that he was supposed to call but.... eh...(things came up and he missed the call) has the nerve to say, sorry Gerry you said you were supposed to call me last night and I already made plans, and mean it, not in a game playing sort of way. A gal whose strong and secure enough with herself to have a life outside of him and let him know that maybe he's lucky that she pays him a little attention.
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Post by swansong on Mar 2, 2009 20:39:06 GMT -5
Of course I don't know the real Gerry anymore than any other fan... but I have speculated on the reason for his single status. It is my belief that this man very much resembles his father physically and emotionally. I believe the primary reason Gerry has not "settled down" is because he is like his father in many ways... but it's more complicated than that. I believe he fears becoming the kind of man his father was, and I believe he does not want to cause a woman he cares for the kind of pain his father caused his mother. He obviously still carries a lot of hurt inside over his parent's split... and he was right there to see for himself the damage left in his father's wake.
I also believe he does not want to fail at fatherhood or leave his children without a dad, should he begin to feel confined in a traditional marriage. I think he's very aware of his tendency NOT to be faithful in relationships, therefore he won't allow himself to explore conventional romance. I do believe he has fallen in love with some of his conquests, but probably sabotages the relationship before the girl gets too set on a commitment.
I hope one day he can leave his fear of failure behind... but only time will tell.
Again, this is just speculation on my part.
Swannie
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Post by Dianne on Mar 2, 2009 20:53:01 GMT -5
Of course I don't know the real Gerry anymore than any other fan... but I have speculated on the reason for his single status. It is my belief that this man very much resembles his father physically and emotionally. I believe the primary reason Gerry has not "settled down" is because he is like his father in many ways... but it's more complicated than that. I believe he fears becoming the kind of man his father was, and I believe he does not want to cause a woman he cares for the kind of pain his father caused his mother. He obviously still carries a lot of hurt inside over his parent's split... and he was right there to see for himself the damage left in his father's wake. I also believe he does not want to fail at fatherhood or leave his children without a dad, should he begin to feel confined in a traditional marriage. I think he's very aware of his tendency NOT to be faithful in relationships, therefore he won't allow himself to explore conventional romance. I do believe he has fallen in love with some of his conquests, but probably sabotages the relationship before the girl gets too set on a commitment. I hope one day he can leave his fear of failure behind... but only time will tell. Again, this is just speculation on my part. Swannie Swannie, you just wrote something I find exceptionally relevant and that is his tendency to sabotage a relationship. I knew a couple guys like this... (doing hair and having a big majority of male clientele I have had the opportunity to have some heart felt relationships with all kinds of men.) Men that tend to do this have always been children of alcoholics. Now let me be very careful by saying I don't know Gerry personally and I am speculating. Male children of alcoholics tend to get into a really great relationship. They know its a great relationship but for some reason they have a tendency to find something about their lady love that is intolerable to them.... like she has man fingers, or she whistles in her nose when she sleeps, or has cankles.(calves and ankles that run together)... they will end the relationship with a lame excuse and find themselves wondering afterward why they did it. Usually they end the relationship in the most hurtful way by all of a sudden seeming uninterested. The phone calls come less and less and they seem distant. A woman may complain that this type of man pulls her toward him with one hand and pushes her away with the other.
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Post by swansong on Mar 2, 2009 21:47:19 GMT -5
Dianne, I believe the reason is because deep down the person does not believe they are worthy of true love or happiness, so when that happiness comes to them, they do something to ruin it. This could explain why he prefers models, because possibly going in, these girls know not to expect anything more than friends with benefits. I think he probably wants a more down to earth woman like his mother, but he feels he doesn't deserve a girl like that, because he knows he will only hurt her.
Gerry can give off the vibe of self confidence, even cockiness, but I think he uses that vibe to disguise his true insecurities....thus his identification with the Phantom.
JMO!
Swannie
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Post by Leppardlady on Mar 2, 2009 22:42:58 GMT -5
All of this just makes me so sad for him, because if this is how he really feels, he may never find the right woman for him. He'll always push her away until he finds himself alone again. I remember reading somewhere how he had talked to Joel Schumacher about the Phantom's lonliness and started to cry. He could relate to Erik's lonliness. They say that some people who are surrounded by other's and seem the happiest are the lonliest people of all.... I better stop, I'm depressing myself.
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Post by pilar on Mar 2, 2009 23:34:25 GMT -5
You hit the nail on the head, sweetiepuss.
As far as how I know this info about him, it's really just surface stuff, believe it or not. When I dig a person, I explore them through their astrological charts. I can gather quite a bit of insight from charts....and it's facinating.
I couldn't say a lot of what I saw in my previous home, because it was deemed too personal.
There is an indication of an extremely difficult childhood. I don't know him personally....but it's there. Another astrologer friend of mine...who is male....brought in the word violence, which I also saw, but was afraid to say out loud. (in his early years).
And it's also within HIM.
When he meets the right one....finds true love....and I hope to GOD he does...he's going to take a lot from his woman.
But he'll also give so much back......
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Post by ava on Mar 3, 2009 1:56:33 GMT -5
Swannie, you just wrote something I find exceptionally relevant and that is his tendency to sabotage a relationship. I knew a couple guys like this... (doing hair and having a big majority of male clientele I have had the opportunity to have some heart felt relationships with all kinds of men.) Men that tend to do this have always been children of alcoholics. Now let me be very careful by saying I don't know Gerry personally and I am speculating. Male children of alcoholics tend to get into a really great relationship. They know its a great relationship but for some reason they have a tendency to find something about their lady love that is intolerable to them.... like she has man fingers, or she whistles in her nose when she sleeps, or has cankles.(calves and ankles that run together)... they will end the relationship with a lame excuse and find themselves wondering afterward why they did it. Usually they end the relationship in the most hurtful way by all of a sudden seeming uninterested. The phone calls come less and less and they seem distant. A woman may complain that this type of man pulls her toward him with one hand and pushes her away with the other. Heat hear Dianne ! As I read that I thought ure talking about my lad. His that was an alcoholic too, like mine so I totaly agree!
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Post by Dianne on Mar 3, 2009 5:23:14 GMT -5
Swannie, you just wrote something I find exceptionally relevant and that is his tendency to sabotage a relationship. I knew a couple guys like this... (doing hair and having a big majority of male clientele I have had the opportunity to have some heart felt relationships with all kinds of men.) Men that tend to do this have always been children of alcoholics. Now let me be very careful by saying I don't know Gerry personally and I am speculating. Male children of alcoholics tend to get into a really great relationship. They know its a great relationship but for some reason they have a tendency to find something about their lady love that is intolerable to them.... like she has man fingers, or she whistles in her nose when she sleeps, or has cankles.(calves and ankles that run together)... they will end the relationship with a lame excuse and find themselves wondering afterward why they did it. Usually they end the relationship in the most hurtful way by all of a sudden seeming uninterested. The phone calls come less and less and they seem distant. A woman may complain that this type of man pulls her toward him with one hand and pushes her away with the other. Heat hear Dianne ! As I read that I thought ure talking about my lad. His that was an alcoholic too, like mine so I totaly agree! Thanks Ava, I too am a child of an alcoholic although my mother didn't drink she had that personality and therefore could be classified as a dry drunk. She was abusive and tended to blame everyone around her for her unhappiness. Anyway as a woman raised in this situation I tend to want to mother everyone, and in turn attract another person with a substance abuse problem that needs to be taken care of.... I recognised this about myself and went into therapy and ended up marrying a normal guy -- breaking the cycle... thank goodness. Before this I was in a relationship with a guy for a short while and when we first dated he swept me off my feet. He was handsome, brought me flowers, told me constantly how lucky he was to be seeing me, was attentive, and literally swept me off my feet. He introduced me to his family and they all liked me and had hope that he FINALLY found a nice girl to turn his life around... Sounds perfect right? Then he began sabotoging our relationship. Not calling when he said he would, showing up late. If I complained about his shabby treatment he would throw it back in my face that I was smothering him, or becoming possessive. Finally he ended the relationship abruptly and cruely and broke my heart. His family continued to come to me to get their hair cut and would feed me information about him... Later, when he learned {through them} that I was engaged to my now husband he began calling me and he told me that he had no idea why he broke up with me and it was all his fault and then went on to say that if I broke up with my fiancee would I give him another chance. Well that never happened. Gerry I fear would be like my old boyfriend.
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Post by pilar on Mar 3, 2009 9:41:42 GMT -5
We always tend to fall for the bad boys, don't we? LOL!!
I lived with a Scorpio for years. Man, are they moody!
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Post by Joy on Mar 3, 2009 9:51:46 GMT -5
I think were all a bit right about Gerry. He may someday find a woman that can keep him happy. This man is going to take so much work just to make a relationship work. I seriously doubt he will ever have children of his own and it wouldn't surprise me at all to find out that he has taken it upon himself to get a V so he can't have kids. If there are no kids then they can't be emotionally scarred.
I see Gerry settling down with a woman that has grown or nearly grown kids. I think he'll be the best grandpa.
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Post by Mary on Mar 3, 2009 10:06:37 GMT -5
Wow. All of this has left me kinda speechless......But it seems plausible from what Ive read about Gerbear and what he has said......I wanna give him a hug (and possibly more!!) and tell him everything will be fine. It seems like he may put too much energy into believeing he will never find the right woman. He is scared of hurting the woman in his life so he stays away from relationships, but yet wants so badly to be in a relationship. Is it all in his subconscience and he's not really aware of the vicious cycle that is keeping him from being happy? I think he is WAY to intelligent to not understand what is going on. He is VERY aware of his inner feelings. I could be totally off though. I feel bad for the guy. I myself am a recovering alcoholic ( TMI!!!)and I know all too well what Gerry is going through. It is a VERY difficult cycle to break. You have to retrain you brain to do things differently and to THINK differently. Unfortunately, IMO, I think Gerry needs to talk to a profefessional. He will never be happy relationship-wise if he doesn't. Maybe has gotten help, I dont know. But then of course none of us KNOW Gerry personally, so we are just guessing. I dont know though really......Im kinda depressed for the guy. I love him so much though!!
BTW, Im not really a doctor, I just play one on the Weirdly Obsessive gerard Butler Message Board!!
Pilar, are you an astrologer? you MUST read me!! Can you do that?
Mary
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Post by Mary on Mar 3, 2009 10:08:35 GMT -5
I also remember reading on more then a few occasions that Gerry has said he wants a STRONG woman with a STRONG personality.....
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Post by pilar on Mar 3, 2009 10:27:12 GMT -5
LOL,Mary!
Yeah, I could give you a basic reading, however, I have a waiting list, so it may be a while.
What Joy said was interesting......it got me thinking. (Dangerous for this blondie, lol!)
My friend on another site said G will be married in 2011. She was very careful, though, as to not say much more about it.
As far as the alcoholism goes....I have no idea if it was that bad with him. My take is that he just enjoyed it for a spell....and everything that came with it. Didn't someone say he was part IRISH, too? Oh my lord....scottish AND Irish ....yeah....you'll drink.....hell yes! LOL!!!
However, that vice has obviously been replaced with others......
Dianne....may I say again how refreshing it is to talk about this stuff without fear of getting spanked? XO
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